The following sentence is the one that jumped off the page for me today,
“God won’t force healing – he invites us to participate.”
I’m a creature of habit. I get up early, have my prayer time in the mornings, and (try to) workout before my workday begins.
At the end of my workday comes errands, dinner prep and cleanup.
And, at the end of that, is when I typically plop onto the couch, scroll on my phone and/or binge watch whatever new series I’ve discovered.
It’s at those times I think, rather than doom scrolling or watching another episode, I should probably read another passage in this booklet, or write another blog post or simply seek out silence to pray more deeply before ending the day.
Choosing a holy habit would certainly be a better option and likely provide more fulfillment.
Yet…I stay on the couch.
This passage showed me that “I’ve stopped hoping to change.”
I convince myself, “I don’t have the strength, I don’t have the energy…I just can’t…”
I always manage to justify my laziness.
St. Catherine of Siena reminds us “that grace responds to our willingness”.
So…If I’m being completely honest with myself, I suppose I can make a better choice…
I’m just not willing to.
Oof…I’m going to have to sit with that realization for a while.
Because, when all is said and done…“God heals when we ask, but often we must first desire to rise, take up our mat…and walk.”
Dear Lord, fill me with the courage to acknowledge what’s broken in my daily routines and awaken my desire to make choices that lead me closer to You. Amen.
